Service in separation is sufficient

Satsvarupa Dasa: Srila Prabhupada had the ability to look through you. I remember a time when he did it to me. It was in the summer of 1972, a few months after he had awarded me sannyasa. It was at the Bhagavat-dharma discourses, held in New Vrindabana on Janmashtami of that year. I had been traveling to the temples in the U.S. helping to institute the morning Bhagavatam class. Srila Prabhupada wanted all the ISKCON centers to hold a daily class in which there would be responsive chanting of Sanskrit and a forty-minute talk on a Bhagavatam verse and purport. This meant we had to study the Bhagavatam and learn to pronounce Sanskrit. That was right up my alley and so I was happy to do it. I was especially satisfied when I thought, I'm simply carrying out his orders and I have nothing else to worry about. But at the New Vrindabana festival, I felt anxious because I wasn't able to see Prabhupada. I was only one out of hundreds of followers. Because I used to have more access to him in the old days, I felt sorry. When I expressed this to Prabhupada's servant, Nanda Kumara, he said, If you like, you can go over to see Prabhupada at the house where he's staying. I took the invitation and drove over in a van with my assistant, Dhrishtaketu Dasa. When we came into Prabhupada's presence, Dhrishtaketu asked, "Prabhupada, in one book you say that we should always chant Hare Krishna twenty-four hours a day?" Prabhupada said, "No if you try you will fall asleep." "Prabhupada," I said, "I don't really have any questions to ask you. But I was in anxiety and wanted to see you." Prabhupada said, "You're one of my older students. You should know better. Service in separation is sufficient." I said, I just wanted to tell you what I'm doing. Then Srila Prabhupada said, "What are you doing?" It wasn't just the words, but it was the way he said it. It went right through me and made me feel, I'm not doing anything. I felt my worthlessness and lack of making a substantial contribution to Prabhupada's mission. At that time, Srila Prabhupada was on continual world tours. He was fighting to keep the Bombay land, and beginning his other big projects in India. I didn't know much of what he was doing in India but I knew some disciples were personally helping him to achieve his goals. By comparison, I felt like an ant. Since he had asked me, I said that I was traveling to temples in the U.S. and instituting the Bhagavatam class. "You should get a bus like Vishnujana Swami," Prabhupada said, "and travel to the interior. He's doing very nicely." I said, "So the Bhagavatam class is not important?" Prabhupada became annoyed and said, "Krishna's head is important and His tail is important." He explained that when the guru says one thing is important, it doesn't mean that other orders aren't important. I became enlivened at Prabhupada's suggestion to start a traveling bus party. As soon as I left his presence, by inquiring around, I was able to get an old school bus, and I immediately started to follow in the footsteps of Vishnujana Swami.