Sex, Rum & Gulab Jamun

Madhudvisa:  An old social worker, who was a very meticulous gentleman, came to see Srila Prabhupada. He had a well-tailored suit, a starched and cuff-linked shirt, a silk tie, spotless shoes, and neatly combed hair. Everything was just proper. Prabhupada started to talk about sex life and how, if a person just wants sex life, then he is like a dog. This gentleman said, "But I like sex life." Prabhupada said, "But to just want sex life is a doggish mentality. Does that mean you are a dog?" The gentleman said, "I guess so. That's what I like."

The conversation went on in that way, and at the end, although the gentleman was soundly defeated, he didn't feel bad. Prabhupada said, "Bring prasadam." The gentleman said, "Oh, no. I am not eating anything right now."

Prabhupada said, "No, no. You must take prasadam." Prabhupada knew that although this man was defeated philosophically, it really didn't affect him. Prasadam would enable him to make a little spiritual advancement. So Prabhupada insisted that this man take prasadam.

Then a devotee brought a gulabjamun, a big sweet full of juice. The devotee plopped this particularly big gulab in the man's hand, a gulab that, like a sponge, had soaked in sugar water for a long time. The man had developed a nice, friendly relationship with Prabhupada and was saying some final words, like "Maybe we can see each other again." At the same time he was trying to balance this gulab in his hand so that it didn't drip. The juice from the gulab started to run down between his fingers. He was trying to tilt his hand up while talking to Prabhupada so that the gulab juice didn't drip. But the juice ran down his wrist, over his starched shirtsleeve, and dripped from his cufflink. He didn't know what to do with this gulab. Prabhupada said, "Eat it." "No, no. I don't want to eat it. I can take it with me."

Prabhupada said, "No, no. You must eat it now."

The man thought, "Well, I'll take a little bite of this gulab, and it will be all right. It will satisfy Prabhupada." So he took a little bite of the gulab, and it ruptured, and a deluge of sweetball juice ran out of the gulab and down his tie, on to his patent leather shoes. Juice was all over the place. Prabhupada said, "No, no. Eat it all. Eat it all."

By this time the man didn't care. He threw it in his mouth, and the juice started to run down his face. His hand was full of gulab juice, his cufflinks, his tie, his pants, his shoes, and it's coming down his face. But he finished the gulab, smiled, and said, "That's very good." Prabhupada said, "Yes." Then the man said, "I'd like to have another one of those."

Prabhupada said, "Very well." The man then said, "I think it will go well in my rum." Prabhupada said, "Wait a second. This is not to be put in your rum. This is prasadam, food offered to the Lord."

The man said, "No, no. It tastes sweet. It will go well in my rum. I drink rum every night. I will put this gulab in my rum." Prabhupada called for another gulab and gave it to the gentleman. The gentleman got up and said, "Thank you very much, Prabhupada. It was nice meeting you" and started to walk out the door, when Prabhupada said, "Now, don't put that in your rum."

The gentleman said, "All right. I will just eat it," and went out smiling with gulab juice all over him.

It was hilarious. We couldn't believe what was going on.