SP condolence meeting for Keshava Maharaja
Early the next morning, Prabhupada receives a telegram from India that his godbrother Bhakti Prajnana Kesava Maharaja passed away two weeks earlier. He at once requests all the devotees to gather in the temple room. Some are thinking, "What happened? What did we do?" Prabhupada begins by narrating how his Guru Maharaja had encouraged him through one of his godbrothers. "One has to accept the renounced order from another person who is in renounced order," he explains. "So I never thought that I shall accept this renounced order of life. In my family life, when I was in the midst of wife and children, sometimes I was dreaming that my spiritual master was calling me, and I was following him. When my dream was over, I was a little horrified. Oh, Guru Maharaja wants me to become sannyasi. How can I accept sannyasa?' At that time I was not feeling satisfaction to give up my family and become a mendicant. At that time it was a horrible feeling. Sometimes I was thinking, No, I cannot take sannyasa.' But again I saw the same dream. So in this way I was fortunate."
As Prabhupada speaks, his voice becomes choked up. "My Guru Maharaja pulled me out from this material life...I have not lost anything. He was so kind upon me...I have gained. I left three children?I have got now three hundred children." He begins to weep. After a long silence he regains his composure. "So I am not the loser. This is a material conception. We think that we shall be the loser by accepting Krishna. Nobody is the loser. I speak from my practical experience. I was thinking, How can I accept this renounced order of life? I cannot accept so much trouble.' But I retired from family life. I was sitting alone in Vrindavana, writing books. So my godbrother, he insisted, Bhaktivedanta Prabhu...' This title was given in my family life. It was offered to me by the Vaishnava society. So he insisted, not he insisted, practically my spiritual master insisted through him, that You accept.' "Because without accepting the renounced order of life, nobody can become a preacher. So he wanted me to become a preacher. So he forced me through this godbrother, You accept.' So unwillingly I accepted. And then I remembered that he wanted me to go to the Western countries. So I am now feeling very obliged to this godbrother, that he carried out the wish of my spiritual master and forced me to accept this sannyas order. "So this godbrother, His Holiness Kesava Maharaja, is no more. He has entered Krishna's abode. So I wish to pass a resolution of bereavement and send it to them. I have composed one verse in this connection in Sanskrit. So you all present, you sign this. So I wish that you all sign this, and I'll send it tomorrow by air mail."
Prabhupada signs and then passes it around for everyone else to sign. Resolved that we, the undersigned members and devotees of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness Incorporated, in a condolence meeting under the presidency of His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami, today the 21st of October, 1968, at our Seattle branch, express our profound bereavement on hearing of the passing of His Divine Grace Om Visnupada Sri Srimad Bhakti Prajnana Kesava Gosvami Maharaja, the sannyas guru, preceptor of our spiritual master, on October 6th, 1968, at his headquarter residence in Nabadwip, West Bengal. We offer our respectful obeisances unto the lotus feet of Sri Srimad B.P. Kesava Gosvami Maharaja with the following verse composed on this occasion by our spiritual master: vairagya-vidya-nija-bhakti-yogam apayayan mam anabhipsu andham sri-kesava-bhakti-prajnana-nama kripambudhir yas tam aham prapadye